Dear Jon, Get Off Jimmy's Nuts

Jon Heyman's aversion to rational inferences based on statistics is well documented at places like FJM, but his dislike of the Mets - or love of Jimmy Rollins - has never been that apparent to me. That is, until I read his latest contribution to SI:

The Mets may unseat the Phillies as NL East champions this year, but there's no sense in trying to beat NL MVP and trash talker extraordinaire Jimmy Rollins at his own game.

Quiet Mets star Carlos Beltran gave it a surprise shot when he got to camp, borrowing Rollins' exact line from last spring in declaring the Mets as "the team to beat." But as Phillies pitcher Brett Myers noted, "Sequels are never as good as the original.''

And then Rollins chimed in the next day, "Has anyone ever heard of plagiarism?''

Beltran, a nice, laconic, well-groomed fellow, stunned folks with his rare back-page fodder. But Rollins holds the patent. He gets all the credit, with only an assist from the Mets for their reaction last spring. "I thank the Mets,'' Rollins said. "They took it upon themselves to take it personally.

Beltran and other Mets types are understandably excited about the acquisition of ace pitcher Johan Santana. Yet the Mets should hold their tongues now for two very good reasons: 1) They had their chance last spring when Rollins spoke, but to a man, they were afraid to speak up, a reticence that was later reflected in the way they played -- scared; and 2) Philly beat the Mets to a pulp down the stretch, winning the last seven head-to-head games.

Beltran gave it a shot. But under the circumstances his words came off as a pale impersonation of the master.

Ok. Besides the excess verbiage (Laconic? Really Jon?), Heyman seems to imply that the Mets should have answered the challenge last spring when *The MVP* declared the Phillies "the team to beat." Jon Heyman, you're a moron. There, I said it.

I'll go out on a limb and say that the only people calling for any Met player to publicly answer Rollins statements were Vinny from Staten Island and Paulie from Bay Ridge - and they were both "first time, long time."

I can't remember a single person in the media that wanted a Met to answer Rollins. If I remember correctly, the opposite was true. Rollins was viewed as a trash talking SS on a historically losing franchise. Why waste breath in answering him? All anyone wanted the Mets to do was go out on the field and take care of business much like they did on Opening Day.

Now, after The Collapse®, Jon Heyman is talking shit about the Mets saying how they should have manned up and fired a shot back? Get the fuck out of here Heyman, you're embarrassing yourself.

Jesus Christ

Can't the world-beaters in the marketing department leave well enough alone?

I woke up to read this email this morning:







How can this team, a team who blew a 12...well you all know what happened, stand on a pedestal and offer a ticket package entitled "Team to Beat" Pack? I'd sign on for a "Let's Wait and See" Pack or even a "We'll Probably Win the Division, but Let's Not Jump to Conclusions" Pack, but "Team to Beat?"

There was a reason why it was so easy to root against the Phillies and Jimmy Rollins last season. I think it had something to do with a SS making bold predictions before the season started.

As Metstradamus has lamented, these comments coming from Beltran's mouth is one thing, having the team latch onto it and turn it into a marketing campaign is another.

The 2008 Mets: Let's Jinx This Motherfucker Before We Even Play a Game.

Jealous Much?

This link (and commentary) is swiped from Fire Joe Morgan...which is arguably the best sports blog on teh interwebs. The article is written by Rich Hofmann of the Philly Daily News, the commentary by KT of FJM (for anyone not familiar with FJM, the original article is bold and the commentary is normal):

The Mets themselves said all of the right things - third baseman David Wright said the Phillies were still the team to beat in the National League East, as did Randolph - but this was quite the welcome for Santana, the two-time Cy Young winner. And listening to the radio on the way home, you could tell it was clear that all of the pomp and circumstance has led Mets fans to the inescapable conclusion that they already have won the World Series, before the first golf club has been shipped to spring training.

Well, they did collapse last year, in horrific, almost 2004 ALCS Yankees-esque fashion. But they were 7th in the NL in team ERA, and 6th in Ks, and they really didn't have a #1 starter. Though their offense struggled late, if they had Santana last year, they'd've made the playoffs easily. So, despite Moises Alou being 58, and Glavine leaving, and Pedro being a wild card, you have to say that getting Santana makes them pretty effing tough.

And, in that spirit, Santana raised his hands at one point and showed off all the World Series rings he won in Minnesota.

Oh, wait.

Ha ha ha ha! He never won a World Series in Minnesota! What a douche. Only jerks and losers don't win World Series titles by themselves.

Santana has won 70 games in the last four years. Here's how the Twins have ended the season in runs scored in those four years: 12th, 8th, 14th (last), 10th.

"It takes 25 players," Santana said, more than once, in response to more than one question in more than one language. He seems a sincere sort, and he has been a great and durable pitcher (although only 15-13 last season).

His team had a .721 OPS. That's 13th out of 14 teams. The league -- the American League, mind you -- batted .225 off him with a .273 OBP. He had 55 more Ks than anyone on the Mets. And this was a down year for Santana.

His career ERA+ is 141. His career WHIP is under 1.1. He Ks 9.5/9 IP. His DERA is 3.20. He is left-handed. His change-up looks like it's being controlled by a dude playing RBI Baseball, who can maneuver it mid-air with a joystick. He is 28.

These are all things you could have written that would have been more relevant than "only 15-13 last year."

The RBI Baseball reference is gold. Pure gold.

Note that the sub-head is "

New York disgustingly canonizes new ace before he even pitches

I'm pretty fucking sure that it's ok to "canonize" Saint Johan before he pitches. A 141 career ERA+ entitles you to that kind of treatment. I'm sure if the Phillies had landed Santana Rich would have kicked him in the nuts threw a battery at his head and said "welcome to Philadelphia."

Since when is it over the top to hold a press conference after a major trade/FA signing and have the player talk to the media/take pictures with the team? Didn't they do the same thing at the Brad Lidge press conference...

And just for shits and giggles, Hofmann throws the obligatory collapse punch right at the end:

The Mets do not want to find out [what will happen if they are in a long divisional fight]... Because they just spent up to $150 million on one of those green Christmas-tree things you hang from the rearview mirror. They would hate to find out that it failed to mask the stench of 7/17.

(That's 7-game lead with 17 to play, not July 17th.)

I'm failing to comprehend how Johan Santana is the equivalent of "those green Christmas-tree things you hang in the rearview mirror." First of all, it's called an air freshener Rich. Second of all, does Santana smell like Pine Sol? Last time I checked making a trade for a dominant starter wasn't to mask the stench of a previous season - it was to make next season's team better.

But alas, that wasn't even the best line that Hofmann scribbled. My favorite part? The spot where he takes a swipe at the fact that Santana doesn't have any rings. You're right Rich, we probably should have signed Livan and his championship instead.

The Team To Beat

After two rain outs in a row, the Mets dismantled the Team To Beat again. There's not much to say other than Charlie Manuel blew up on this glory-seeking waste of a radio talk show host. The recaps of the incident are linked to by CSTB here and here.

Metsradamus has a nice piece following Moises' breakout game (HR wise) and cogently points out that Freddy Garcia never topped 85 mph on the radar gun last night.

Tonight the Mets try and extend their lead in the division when they travel to beautiful Dolphin Stadium to take on the D-Train and the Marlins.

In case anyone forgot, Dontrelle is 11-2 all-time against the Mets with a 2.02 ERA and 91 strikeouts in 115 2/3 innings. We'll see what happens.

Sometimes It's Better To Keep The Old Mouth Shut

Keith Hernandez is a prophet. Jimmy Rollins is going to have to hit .400/50/150 to back up his mouth at this point. (Photo swiped from Adam Rubin's Surfing the Mets Blog)

Update: LoDuca goes yard in the top of the first, Delgado drops a routine toss from Jose "Pink Panther Moustache" Valentin on the first hitter in the bottom half and Glavine promptly walks Renteria on 4 pitches...Chipper pops up and I cross my fingers.