It's Not A Blowout Until Keith Hernandez Insults A Baby

Pelfrey was erratic and ineffective, the defense was shoddy, and for everyone who didn't believe - Ambiorix isn't a good pitcher. It's been all Braves - 7-0 bottom 8 - and it hasn't been pretty.

After a brief exchange about his trademark Tootsie Roll Pops - orange tonight for those of you keeping score at home - Keith proceeded to call a shot of a baby in an Easter Bunny outfit a "wookie" and then quickly corrected himself, stating that the child looked more like an "ewok." Ron thought it was a Gremlin but who's really counting.

Bottom line, if the Mets don't win the next two games the Braves assume the "team to beat" status from the Phillies.

Well, they technically haven't lost yet. Endy and Reyes are on 2nd and 1st, respectively, with one out. The ever-effective (0-his last 16) Captain Red Ass is at the plate.

(Update:) LoDuca grounds into a 1-6-3 DP and Howie Rose is almost ready to put it in the books...even though he's in Buffalo.

But Can He Hit?

<-- Greg Dobbs, Philadelphia Phillies 1B

Instead of telling you about John Maine's 6 innings of no-hit baseball, the Marlin defense that made me remember the 2003 Mets, and the 4-spot that the Mets tacked on the D-Train in the first inning, we're going to focus on just exactly how bad the Phillies are and how bad the situation is becoming.

Their "ace" - hold the wife-beater jokes - is 0-2 with an 8.82 ERA and has just been moved to the bullpen.

Last season's MVP has struggled at the plate and now is going to miss some time with a sprained ligament in his leg. His replacement for the time being...Greg Dobbs.

Their manager snapped...at a radio show host. (Link swiped from CSTB)

Oh, and by the way, they have the worst record in the Major Leagues at 3-10.

The team to beat is certainly getting beat.

The Team To Beat

After two rain outs in a row, the Mets dismantled the Team To Beat again. There's not much to say other than Charlie Manuel blew up on this glory-seeking waste of a radio talk show host. The recaps of the incident are linked to by CSTB here and here.

Metsradamus has a nice piece following Moises' breakout game (HR wise) and cogently points out that Freddy Garcia never topped 85 mph on the radar gun last night.

Tonight the Mets try and extend their lead in the division when they travel to beautiful Dolphin Stadium to take on the D-Train and the Marlins.

In case anyone forgot, Dontrelle is 11-2 all-time against the Mets with a 2.02 ERA and 91 strikeouts in 115 2/3 innings. We'll see what happens.

If They Win 40 Games, They Got One From Us

After a great performance on Friday night against the Nats which included a man who eats 50 egg whites per day get the winning hit, El Duque looked his age against a shaky at best Nationals lineup today. For the record, I don't see how an umpire can feel that a pitcher is intentionally throwing at someone when the pitch is clocked at 32.4 mph and/or the batter reaches out and catches it wiffle-ball style.

The good news is, while Pelfrey was shaky on Friday, his stuff looks as good as ever and hopefully the Professor can whip him into early Spring Training form. The bad news is that NYC, and the rest of the East Coast for that matter, is supposed to get spanked by a Al Gore-esque monsoon/Nor'Easter/global warming induced/Day After Tomorrow style/already produced baseball sized hail in Dallas/super-mega-ultra storm.

I guess that means no baseball on Jackie Robinson Day at Shea.

If not, the Mets head to Philly for two and Florida for two...I'm more excited about Dolphins Stadium...what a stadium for baseball.

Take Your Base

7 walks in 2 2/3 and a chorus of boos were too much for the Mets to overcome last night against Jimmy Rol...the Phillies and Adam Eaton. The offense couldn't do anything against the Phillies worst starter and Jimmy Rollins actually played well.

Moving on.

If they play tonight it's a match up of elders as Glavine takes on 44-year-old Jamie Moyer in the rain.

• Wally Matthews is back at it. Thankfully his radio show isn't.


• A 300-pound drunk fan fell on a 58-year-old woman and broke her back on Opening Day.


• Lastings is going to N'awlins.


• Steve Phillips, how we miss your idiotic moves.

JIM-MY ROL-LINS, JIM-MY ROL-LINS

Being that this was the first Opening Day I had been to in 7 years, I was pumped for the occasion. And aside from learning that parking and general driving in and around Shea will be a nightmare for two years, it was all that I expected it to be.

An erratic starting performance, a bunt against the shift, a controversial bullpen move, a classic comeback, and of course, Jimmy Rollins being mocked by 56,000 people.

And I'll have to agree with Metstradamus...I haven't wished for a sweep during the regular season this hard since last century against the Braves.

• Faith and Fear had a great piece on the win.
• The Post has a great piece on the win.
• The Daily News had a great piece on the win.
• All in all, it was a hell of a game, a hell of a comeback, and should be a hell of a season.

Touché, Mr. McCarver

As I watched Shawn Green tear the cover off the ball right into Goldilocks' glove yesterday afternoon, I got mad at the game of baseball. Why, you ask? Because if David Wright doesn't steal second, the game is probably tied. Instead, a good move may have cost the Mets a shot at tying the game in the ninth.

The Hebrew Hammer has tacked on to his recent success at the plate launching a Kyle Davies offering out of Turner Field moments before Ramon Castro followed with an absolute moonshot to put the Mets up 2-1 in Atlanta.

• Pelfrey hit two batters and was a little shaky in his final tuneup.
• Did you know that Tom Glavine and John Smoltz are friends?!?!?
• David Wright prefers to get his beauty rest.
• The 72' Dolphins just cracked open a bottle of champagne.
• Did I mention that John Smoltz and Tom Glavine are friends? Off the field too?!?!?

Right now: 2-1 Mets leading the Bravos bottom 4. El Duque looks sharp save for a lead off HR by Kelly Johnson...in fact he hasn't allowed a hit since. Plus, Gary Cohen just tossed "befuddled" into the broadcast, it's a hell of an afternoon.

Sometimes It's Better To Keep The Old Mouth Shut

Keith Hernandez is a prophet. Jimmy Rollins is going to have to hit .400/50/150 to back up his mouth at this point. (Photo swiped from Adam Rubin's Surfing the Mets Blog)

Update: LoDuca goes yard in the top of the first, Delgado drops a routine toss from Jose "Pink Panther Moustache" Valentin on the first hitter in the bottom half and Glavine promptly walks Renteria on 4 pitches...Chipper pops up and I cross my fingers.

The Professor: MVP

Although I didn't think my wish for Tyler Yates would come true so soon, it did and it was just as I imagined. The Mets improved to 4-0 after shellacking the Braves in Atlanta tonight. It goes to show you that anytime I mention something, it's usually wrong.

After singing the praises of the Braves strengthened pitching staff, the Mets pounded them for 11 runs, including 6 of them off the very, very improved bullpen that I fawned over not 12 hours ago. Well, I never said I was intelligent.

The real story was Oliver Perez and his terrific performance: 7 IP, 5 H, 1 ER, 6 K, 0 BB. He located his pitches well, kept the Braves off-balance, and when he started to get wild he composed himself and got back to business. It's only one start, but it was hard not to be impressed. Ron Darling said it at the top of the broadcast, with Perez's stuff he can very easily turn 2006's 3-13 record around to 13-3 in 2007.

In other breaking news, Gary Cohen spoke the truth when he declared The Professor the Mets early season MVP. Keith promptly agreed, and went on to tell some rollicking good stories about El Sid nearly being mauled by a giant Tiger Shark off the coast of Hawaii. Good times in Mets Fandom...good times indeed.

House of Horrors, Here We Come

If last season was any indication the Mets' troubles in Atlanta should be over. But, being the ever pessimistic fan that grew up watching the events that inspired Turner Field being dubbed "The House of Horrors," you can never be too sure.

Sending a message this early in the season by handling the Braves at home will only help the Mets down the road. A sweep would be euphoric, but 2 of 3 will do. A highlight will be (assuming they don't use a 5th starter yet) Smoltz v. Glavine on Saturday at 3:55.

I'll go out on a limb here and say that the Braves are the Mets biggest competitors in the NL East this season. The Phillies bullpen is terrible, their starters aren't as good as they've shown so far, and a lack of pitching means death in Citizens Bank.

The Braves improved almost every aspect of their team this offseason. Tim Hudson can't possibly be as bad as he was in 2006, and their bullpen is significantly better. Did I mention their bullpen was much, much better? They have an all-star catcher and a superstar CF in a contract year. Renteria should be better sans the problems of Boston, Chuck James looks like the real deal, and we shouldn't see any Tyler Yates unless it's in Rich Rodriguez-esque mop-up situations.

It should be a return to the rivalry years of 99'-01' from the looks of everything. And I don't know about you, but if history is any factor that's a little scary.

• Tonight, Perez looks to repeat Game 7 against Mark Redman at 7:35, SNY & WFAN
  

It's a Fact, The Mets Are Good For Business

<-- Aaah, memories.

According to Newsday, ESPN's Sunday Night Baseball opener featuring the Mets and Cardinals was the highest rated opening day/night game since 1994, drawing a 6.9 share in New York and attracting 3.5 million viewers nationally. Not quite football, but better than bowling.

Tonight's game may be the most anticipated of the early season for one reason: Braden Looper. Not too many people have forgotten the waste of a closer's taunting of the Mets last season after Game 7. If only this game was at Shea...Here's hoping when the Cards visit Queens the rotation falls in such a way that Mr. Looper can receive the worst all-around booing since John Rocker was good.

In fact, here's a heck of a suggestion from Metstradamus "Maybe instead of a ceremonie, Braden Looper can sing the "Jose Jose" song in front of the sold out Wednesday crowd. Am I a bad person for being a little extra excited that Looper is pitching tonight?" I for one certainly don't think so.

• The Mets are thankful that Heilman is not Brad Lidge...yet.


• The full-effects of searching for Dominican food in Miami at 2AM are still being felt.


• Mike Vaccaro doesn't care that the front of the rotation is a combined 82-years-old.

Mets, Cards 8:05 SNY & WFAN. Maine and Looper...I'm excited.

Graced By The Genius!

Top of the 2nd in St. Louis Gary, Keith, and Ron go live to the Professor himself in the dugout. The Professor spoke of magic numbers, 38 batters, and butterflies flying in formation into gloves.

Disappointingly enough, there was no mention of ketchup or ice cream.

Just a quick side note, someone needs to get in Gary's headset and tell him that Kip Wells was never "an ace in Pittsburgh." Mets 1, Cards 0. El Duque looks sharp so far, maybe we can get a few more innings out of him.

1 Down, 161 to Go

With every starter - including Glavine - getting in the hit column on Sunday night, there wasn't much more a Met fan could ask for in a season opener. The Hebrew Hammer began silencing the critics early, Jose Valentin saved Joe Smith and Aaron Heilman simultaneously, and Carlos Delgado's wife should be receiving gifts from every man, woman and child rooting for the Mets for having that baby a week ago rather than Sunday night.

The biggest question that arose from the victory was Willie's choice to bring Smith out of the bullpen in the eighth instead of Heilman. I didn't have a problem with the move and I don't see how you could argue against it. At the time the Mets were sitting non-save situation type lead and just looking to wrap up the victory. Heilman is admittedly not feeling fantastic and I think if Smith impresses the club enough you'll see a lot more of him late in games then anyone expected.

• I don't know how to say "Spring Training doesn't mean anything" in Hebrew.
• You expected the great D from Beltran, but not so much from the other guy.
• John Harper doesn't agree with me or Mr. Randolph.
• 21 losses in March really doesn't mean much.
• Carlos Beltran is the second best player in the NL according to Mark Hale...Adam Wainwright was not available for comment.

Tonight: El Duque takes on arthrit....I mean Kip Wells at 8:05